What’s Love Got To Do, Got To Do With It?

Posted on August 31, 2009. Filed under: Uncategorized |

Tina Turner says it’s nothing by a second hand emotion; a sweet old fashioned notion. Girl with the gams might have been a tad bit jaded when she penned the famous lyrics (recall the bruises that the “love” of the late Ike left her with) but still, she had a point.

Once upon a more intelligent time, in fact, basically since the beginning of time, people married to perpetuate the financial and political mandates of the involved families. Marriages were arranged in order to promote the success of each family; a sort of mercenary union, the original merger and acquisition. Love may or may not have ensued but divorce certainly did not. Today, it seems, marrying for dollars and common “cents” is less admirable than marrying for romance and yet divorce is at an all time high. Actually, marrying for love is not only admired but set as our greatest goal; the one that I am certain, prevents us bright and capable women from never achieving that other little goal – having it all.

Having it all and being responsible for it all are two very different things yet somehow, this is the stupidity of the myth of love and its cloud of delusion that women continue to buy into everyday. Rather than marrying the man who offers greener pastures, we marry the man who offers the gaze of green eyes. Then, years later, we’re stunned and horrified when we discover his gorgeous green eyes have nothing behind them and have been spending “late nights at the office” starring down the bursting bosom of a younger and hotter us. It’s like being shocked and upset when you don’t win the lottery. At least you had the sense to not put every one of your hard earned pennies into the sweaty palm of the quickie mart clerk in exchange for that ticket to poverty.

I admit that sometimes, green-eyed gaze guy may offer something more than a life of doing it all. By this I mean the high and mighty opportunity to work all day, cook and clean all night, bear and raise his children, age, wrinkle, and be merry. Green-eyed gaze guy may be somewhat intelligent and even willing to put down his GameBoy to notice that you’ve been spending your free time (the little that you’re left with) noticing the younger hotter version of him. Or, he may be downright perfect and 40 years into your marriage, Viagra free, the two of you will still be hanging from the chandeliers, albeit lucite and not crystal. Congratulations if this last sounds like you. You’re a social anomaly and all at once, the most awe and barf inspiring thing known to man (women actually).

So, women who can do it all – do your homework and invest wisely. Bank on the guy who will provide the greatest return. And if it is illustrious love that you’re after, you can love him for being Established – smart, charismatic, successful, generous and your greatest supporter; whatever you’d like that to mean.

Sub note: If my darling husband is reading this, worry not. We are among the awe and barf inspiring and I love you.